Wise words

Lzzy Hale, of the band Halestorm, keeps  a blog on Tumblr. I found this recent post of hers quite profound.
I’m old enough to be her mother, but I dig her music. And her wise words.

Her post starts out with this:

Let’s start with the fact that It doesn’t matter what race you are, what your sexual preference or orientation is, what gender you are, what age you are, what social status you hold, or how much you make a year. We are all equal. We are all humans.

I see and feel this notion at the Rock Show. Here, people of all walks of life, put aside their petty differences for the common joy of music. People meet and become friends who in the outside world, would normally never run in the same circles. It’s a phenomenon that is truly an amazing and inspirational thing to be a part of! 

Pretty amazing stuff, isn’t it? She continued to make points about being yourself; the current state of, ahem, politics, without mentioning names.

Wise words, indeed.


I’m Stef and this is where it’s @ !~



I know it’s October and all…

but this is just plain creepy:

Email from Lisa?

This indicates that there is a new post from this blog, but when I go to click on the link, I get an error message.

See, this email was automatically generated from my friend Lisa’s blog, The 13th Apostol. Only problem is this-

Lisa died in a car accident nearly 7 years ago. That’s what makes this so creepy. 

And I still miss that crazy broad! We were friends for only about 4 years. I still can’t bear to delete her from my Facebook friends list. Her birthday is next month. This year, it’s on Thanksgiving. 

And I’ll be forever thankful for those 4 years of friendship. 

Miss you, chica.

I’m Stef and this is where it’s @ !~

If everyone were forced to wear a label…

What would yours say?

Mine would say:

WARNING: contains many, if not all, of the following- rational thought, compassion, empathy, loyalty; may also contain civil disobedience, argumentative attitude, and a rebellious streak; also: strong language, bawdy humor, a “doesn’t care what you think” mindset, and a “you better not mess with me and mine or you’ll live to regret it” attitude. Some of these traits may not be suitable for all consumers. Not all traits are listed. Your mileage may vary.

I posted this on Facebook several years ago. It still applies. 


I’m Stef and this is where it’s @ !~

Let’s talk about pain

I have made peace (sort of) that some time this weekend, I’ll be making yet another trip to the ER because I’m in a significant amount of pain in all the wrong places.

They’ll weigh me, take my vitals, ask about insurance coverage, and then they’ll ask about the pain.

  1. Is it constant, or does it come and go?
  2. Do you feel nauseous?
  3. Where is the pain, exactly?
  4. Have you experienced this kind of pain before?

Okay, let’s go through these in order:

  1. The pain came and went initially, then decided to come in, hang up its hat and coat, sit down, put its feet up and ask me for a beer and a sandwich. Oh, and don’t bother me, the game is on.
  2. At the moment, I feel like I need to hurl, but nothing happens.
  3. Right up under my right breast, making life a tad difficult.
  4. Yes, in January, Pancreatitis decided to visit. It just wanted to watch bad Lifetime movies and QVC and a couple of Thunder games for four days. I had to evict it. I wanted to evict Gallbladder, too, but it paid its rent on time. It wouldn’t be prudent to evict it at this juncture because Liver liked having it around. Apparently, it tells great jokes that keep Liver amused. I’m convinced that Liver and Gallbladder are co-dependent. 

Then the nurses/ER physician du jour will ask about my last cycle. Auntie Flo decided she’d had enough of me and moved Florida to retire. It’s been 10 months and I don’t miss her, the bitch. She’d made my life hell for 40 years. I was grateful that she took vacations 4 times, in 1983, 1986, 1991, and 1993. She tried to go on vacation in 1989, but that didn’t work out.

Then, if there’s room, and a really good reason for me to stay put, I’ll be admitted the health spa. 

Me, whining to myself: I don’t wanna go to the health spa! I wanna go to the Machine Shop next month!

We’ll see how all this shakes out. Suffice it to say that I’m probably not going to the fair on Sunday. 

I’m Stef and this is where it’s @ !~

I think I might be a little, um, depressed

Some twenty years ago, I was diagnosed as clinically depressed. I took anti depressants (Zoloft and a couple others), and I felt better. My doctors eventually weaned me off of them, and I haven’t had any problems since.

Until now.

With my illness (liver disease, in case you’re new to the blog), it kind of snuck up on me. I know these feelings well. 

Lethargy, trouble sleeping, losing interest in things… they’re all there. And it kills that I just can’t power through it. I’ve tried. I haven’t felt quote-unquote normal for a while. The only exception to that is when I went to Dallas last month. I was with my tribe, fellow metal fans, and the music was my drug. 

I think that’s why I went. I’d bought my ticket between two hospital stays, and the planning and saving money to actually make the trip possible good for me.

Getting to spend a day with my friend Cynthia (who I’ve known for over 40 years!) was a bonus. I was on her turf for a change😀

I’m going to talk to my PA at the liver clinic next month about this. Perhaps she’ll have some ideas for me. 

Meanwhile, I know it’s just not in my head. These feelings are real. I wish I could figure it out on my own, but I think I’m smart enough to know when I need help. 

I’m not suicidal or anything. I have so much to live for! But I’m waving the white flag now. 

Take a look at this video I found on Facebook. It brings up some interesting points. 

Thanks for reading!📚📓📒📖


I’m Stef and this is where it’s @ !~

We are all… Disturbed!

My trip to Dallas to see Disturbed and Breaking Benjamin is this week, and I’m excited as all get out! 

I just have some last minute stuff to take care of, then on Thursday, I get on the Heartland Flyer and head to Fort Worth, where I’ll pick up the rental car (which has become more trouble than it’s worth). I’ve had the hotel reservations since June (and it’s probably a dive, but it’s close to the venue), and the ticket to the show since March. What kills me is that 2 months after I purchased said ticket, the band announced an OKC show the day before the show in Dallas. 

However, I have several high school friends living in the Dallas metroplex (and we went to school in southern California!), and the chance to get out of my comfort zone (all of OKC) was a huge draw. 

And I’m not really enamored of the Zoo Amp anyway. Sorry not sorry. I’ve been there three times, and it was not a pleasant experience any of those times for different reasons. 

But I digress…

I’m getting pumped for the show, getting packed and getting ducks (tickets, paperwork, etc.) in a row so that on Thursday, I can get on the train with no worries. 

Keeping my fingers crossed!

I’m Stef and this is where it’s @ !~